Peace in My Troubled Sea

Where do you get your peace when you’re traveling the treacherous seas of life? Do you find your peace by withdrawing? Do you find it in watching TV? Do you find it in shopping, drinking, or eating? Let me share with you where I find peace when I sail life’s treacherous seas.

While there are a few different definitions of peace, I’m referring to the serenity or tranquility that comes over a person during difficult times, the kind of peace that produces composure, a regaining of self so we can hold on with a renewed strength throughout the storm.

A couple of months ago, as I began my blogging career, I wrote about joy and sorrow. I wrote, “Joy and sorrow go hand-in-hand. They’re a team. We can’t have one without the other.” If my life is evidence of this, then once again I can honestly say this is truth because I’ve lived another week experiencing both joy and sorrow.

True Story Ahead

Have you ever had a week where multiple people you care about have major medical appointments? By “major” I mean, they’re meeting with doctors to find out how serious their health symptoms are?

Well, I had three very close family members have such appointments this week.

I’ve shared I’m going to be grandma around Thanksgiving. One more month and I’ll get to hold a precious miracle in my arms. I can hardly wait. Joy.

My sweet daughter-in-law shared with us this little tike was breech. Like all moms-to-be, Courtney felt a little nerve wracked thinking about the “what-ifs” baby stayed breech.

On Tuesday afternoon I received this text, “Baby’s head is down!” Joy filled my heart!

After celebrating, I asked, “How are your platelets?”

“Still dropping,” she answered.

My heart dropped too because I knew this would mean another specialist appointment and possibly some medical treatment that could be difficult for Courtney. We had to wait for Thursday to find out.

Wednesday, my 87-year old mom was diagnosed with breast cancer…again. While we don’t know what treatment lies ahead for her given her other health issues, my heart is sorrowful. My mom struggles with dementia. I can’t even call to comfort her because she probably doesn’t remember she has cancer. We’ll find out next Tuesday what the wisest next step will be for her.

Thursday, Courtney’s hematologist provided some relief. A little joy in midst of a sorrowful week, she would not need to do any treatment right now. But, that could change during delivery. That’s okay. We’ll take this good news.

Friday, my husband had his sixth-month check up with his hematologist/oncologist. Bob has a rare blood disorder called Amyloidosis. In fact, eight years ago this November he underwent his first treatment, a stem cell transplant, at Mayo Clinic.

While waiting in the oncologist’s office, I witnessed sorrow. My heart dropped for these patients. This is not a place you go if you’re looking for joy.

Good News…Bob’s still in the “gray zone!” In laymen’s terms, on a scale of white-to-black, Bob’s in the middle, where it’s gray. As long as he stays there, he won’t need treatment. His doctor’s goal is to keep him in the gray zone as long as possible. There’s no cure for Amyloidosis.

While Bob’s numbers continue to be stable, he still has Amyloidosis. Joy and Sorrow.

My Lighthouse

Sometimes I think I’m really tough. I mean, come on, I’ve been through a lot in my life. Okay, I am tougher than I used to be, but sometimes my strength gets tested. And weeks like this week, I find myself feeling as though I’m on board a boat being tossed around by tempest waves. By the end of this week, I felt a tad seasick. I needed calmness. I needed the boat to stop rocking to regain my balance.

When I get like this, I usually need a little time away from others because the consequence usually strains my relationships, if you know what I mean. I need to seek God.

This morning, I woke up still feeling queasy from the turmoil of the week. Many times, I know if I listen to worship music, my soul is soothed.

I listened to one of my favorite bands this morning, Rend Collective. Their song, “My Lighthouse” brought me out of the waves and into the light. They reminded me that God leads us through the storms and carries us safely to shore.

[callout]“For He Himself is our peace.” – Ephesians 2:14[/callout]

This has become one of my favorite verses. God personally is our peace. Have you ever thought about that? God Himself is peace. How awesome is that?

Plus, Luke 1:79 says God will guide our feet into the way of peace.

Now I know when I need peace, I need God Himself. After a week like this week, I need a lot of God Himself. I encourage you to seek God when you’re in need of peace. He works better than eating, shopping, or TV.

To endure the treacherous seas of life, we need to find our peace in God. He is the only way we will be able to experience calmness through life’s toughest struggles. God Himself helps us establish our composure to stay strong, and He promises to carry us safely to shore.