Once again, I’ve been reading A. W. Tozer’s book, The Pursuit of God. I don’t know how many times I’ve read his book, but at least three times and even now as I re-read it, I’m in awe of his wisdom, knowledge, understanding, and insight about the Triune God.
When I read A. W. Tozer’s words, I have to read them in small chunks so that I can digest the content because it’s so rich. Kind of like eating a piece of cheesecake, I can’t eat a whole piece of cheesecake at one time. It’s too rich. Cheesecake is better one small bite at a time. I need to savor each bite and let the richness be enjoyed. It’s delicious!
Today, I was reading about the self-life. Tozer had strong conviction about the intense work that only Christ can do in us because of our self-life, “the hyphenated sins of the human spirit. They are not something we do, they are something we are.” Whoa! That is hard to swallow. The self-life is who we are? Yep!
Tozer then provides a list of self-sins: “self-righteousness, self-pity, self-confidence, self-sufficiency, self-admiration, self-love,” and I know there are many other self-sins too.
And I thought to myself, “That’s a whole lot of self! How selfish!” Then I thought how I often use “ish” in reference to something I think is disgusting (like canned tuna). To me canned tuna is all “ish!” I mean, seriously, I hate the smell profusely. I hate the taste. It makes my stomach churn. I’ve actually come very close to vomiting from eating tuna. I think that’s exactly what self-sins are like. They are “ish” to God and to others.
I was convicted. I stopped reading. I needed to ask for forgiveness of all my “ish.” We serve an amazing God who forgives who we are and changes the self-“ish” part of who we are into something lovely and rich. It’s work only Christ can do in us when He lives in us. We have to do our part and kneel before the cross, repent of our selfish ways. When Jesus Christ enters our self-life, His intent is “to deliver us from the power of the self-sins,” that is, our “ish.”
This is painful. I won’t lie. But there is so much to be gained when we allow Christ to live in us and get rid of the disgusting “ish.”
I listened to Rend Collective’s song, “Christ Lives in Me” this morning. The lyrics are powerful, meaningful, and taken right from Scripture. Made me cry this morning and rejoice because Christ lives in me. I gain so much more by getting rid of the “selfish” than what I lose.
It’s kind the difference between cheesecake or canned tuna.
Scripture:
Philippians 1:21 – For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.
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